Sahan's.

10:55am: She sat up against my wall for two days. I would stare at her for hours. As I would enter to the room she would be there, right where I left her from that night in Toronto. I would sit in my chair, she would sit against the wall, and we'd stare at each other for hours. I didn't dare touch her. This went on for two days. Finally I decided to undress her.

I laid her down on my bed. Still I could not bring myself to touch her. She sat like that for another hour.



When I grew comfortable with her there I gently brought myself beside her. She smelled of polished wood.



I was nervous taking her out. My fingers trembled as they touched her, and yet I was eager to. Her wood felt so soft. She was as light as a feather. I struck a few chords and she sang. Her voice reverberated from her belly, through her frame, and onto my arms. Her voice was rich and bold. I have never heard anything like it.

The first time I held her I was shy. She is fearfully beautiful. Strong. I still get nervous holding her in my arms.
We're still getting used to each other.



   Right then. Onto business. I've been on hiatus for some time now. After coming from exams I noticed I've been vegetating in my house for weeks. And for an old soul that takes pleasure in adventuring and storytelling it is a harsh treatment. So this hiatus really helped me get back into my groove. It was a much needed break you see. A break from life. During this time I've had many adventures and collected lots of stories to tell. In time I will tell them all.
   I haven't forgotten anybody, just so you know. But I'm yearning these days to talk with people other than through MSN and Facebook. I did something like this two years ago and I feel it's time for that again. It reminds me of the pleasures of a real conversation. It also reminds me who my good friends are, as opposed to "that guy on my list". So! Will I return to the online community? Sure. But I'm too high on life to do that right now.

    I got a new guitar. Note the word "got." And every day I pick it up to play I think to myself, "Angela is a nut." But I love her.
    I have a new job as well. More on that later.
    I also noticed there seems to be this game going on these days. A game played on ice, with sticks, and some disk of rubber. And apparently the Canadian team has reached the last stage of this competition. I'm no expert on these sort of matters, but I wish them the best. And I am sorry they lost the first game.
    I bought this Bluetooth adapter yesterday so now I'm able to upload all my cellphone pictures to my computer. Sorry for the low quality but that's all a poor sap like me could afford without purchasing a fansy pants camera.

   So that's it. I'm well and alive. Just wanted to let the masses know that. My plan weeks ago was to write a post about Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan. But I'm going to save him for next time. So look forward to that. Oh yes, and I found this while rummaging through my basement.



About ONE of you will know what this is.



Good night.

6:09pm:

A poem for Kenny.

Sahan> I wrote a poem for you:

Shake dat thing miss kana kana.
Shake dat thing miss annabella.
Shake that thing yan donna donna.
Jodi and Rebecca.

Yo sexy ladies want par with us
Inna the car wit us
Them nah war wit us
Inna da club them want flex wit us
To get next to us
Them cah vex wit us



Sahan> That's an accurate depiction of me composing that poem.

"Sexy... ladies... want par wit us...
umm.... INNA DA CAR WIT US! -- yes! brilliant!"

12:43am: Sahan> Speaking of losing my mind, I had this midterm in the morning. Its for circuits. I had little sleep the night before and my mind was gone by the end of the exam hour. So after handing in my paper I was feeling thirsty. I took out my water bottle, from my bag, and took a gulp of water from it. Now that's when the memory of this incident becomes hazy.

   You see, right after taking the sip of water, I remember still feeling thirsty. I was bewildered by this, but proceeded to close the cap and put the bottle back in the bag. When I looked down there was a puddle of water on my chair and dripping into my bag. I know what it may insinuate....But my brain specifically remembers taking a sip of water. I have a memory of the bottle coming up, and assumption of water going through my throat, and then a memory of closing the lid. Either I have a hole in my jaw, or I was damn out of it.

    I'm telling you man, I swear I took a sip of water. I was sure I did. The fact that I was still thirsty, and the puddle of water, is just purely coincidental. Although, right afterwards, when I turned around the prof and TA were staring at me. And, one might say, with a look of -- what might be approximated as--  pity.

    As if to say, "Poor sap. Maybe he forgot his medication." Or, "I'm glad they're allowing special-ed students to take this class now."


Kenny> Ah sahan, you're losing your simple functions. Did you put too much water in your mouth? or just miss your mouth completely? Or did you just dream drinking and just pour the water on the floor. "1 for homies who ain't here"

Sahan> No, I think I miseed completely. Man. what might've seemed funnier was that i never reacted to this. I just took the sip of water (or thought I did), closed the lid, put it in my bag, and walked away. From the perspective of someone else it may have seemed like something I do on a regular basis. "Ah there goes Sahan, the bumpkin."

     That may have made me look more like a retard. Someone observing me would've seen a guy taking a bottle up, pouring it in front of his mouth, completely missing and falling to the chair and wetting his sweater, and then walking away with indifference.
      Damn. the looks on the faces of the TA and prof... it was like they were sad for me, in a disgusted sort of way.

Kenny> HAHAHAHAHA. man, that would have been hilarious. if i saw that i would be like ".......fucking hamilton. Control these people."
   I have never experienced/seen that level of exhuastion. I think you've reached a new level Sahan. I've been up for 36 hours with no food (goddamn you 36 hour famine). I've hiked over 70 miles surviving off vector bars and oatmeal, with 70 lbs on my back, and a sleeping bag with a 0 degrees celcius rating in -15 degree weather. I've seen people fall asleep on campus benches after doing the 48 hour report. But you...you beat them all. Ahahha. I crown you king of exhaustion.

1:58am:

An open letter to my nemesis:

              You know Kenny, I've been pondering. I've concluded that I find Mathematicians

particularly interesting. They're people like us, who've devoted their lives to their discovery

of abstract concepts. They're really something to admire. Where we take math as another

stepping stone -- a foot stool even -- to help us reach greater heights, they have spent much

of their lives developing and investigating these stools. And its not merely their effort that I

find so fascinating. It's the fact that they take a sincere interest in the matter. They are

sincerely interested in mathematics.

                This all occured to me as I was attempting to find the office hours of the TA who
teaches my math tutorial. Of course, as you may know, I've never gone to a single math
tutorial since first year (and I know of them only through heresay), I needed to find out the
tutorial number so I may write it on my test paper. When I found this person I discovered
that she's a graduate student who happens to be researching "Geometry and Topology".
This piqued my curiosity. You see, she's actually being paid to study, develop, and
perhaps enhance this field. Now I know my tone may insinuate jest, but I assure you not.
I am quite serious when I say that I have respect for her. Its incredible how a person can
find interest enough in such an abstract field to study and enhance it.

                Upon further investigation I found that "At McMaster research focuses on
Algebraic Topology (homotopy theory, K-theory, surgery), Geometric Topology (group
actions on manifolds, gauge theory, knot theory), and Differential Geometry (curvature,
Dirac operators, Einstein equations, and general relativity)."

              Most of those I have never heard of. With the exception of general relativity, I find

it incredible how vast the field of geometry has evolved (my knowledge of geometry stops

at planes and 3d curves). But she isn't the only one. Since I was younger i've always had a

keen fascination towards mathematicians. This is because I hated math. I was terrible at it

and found it to be so trite. I had great admiration for people like Gauss, Legrange, Newton,

Fermat, et cetera. To be so entrenched in math, so engrossed, to absorb it through every

pore of your body. It's absolutely fascinating. At their best they are poets. They take the

philosophy of math and write their poems in the form of equations.

              So where am I going with this? I have concluded with these findings that I would very

much like to meet a sexy female mathematician. I'm sure there are plenty. So, I would like to

be with one since I find them so attractive and fascinating at the same time.

              The biggest weakness of a physicist is the mathematics. This goes doubly for

engineers. As an engineering physicist, I am in deep trouble when it comes to matters of

formulae and abstraction. However, I think with my sexy mathematician, we'll form an

unstoppable team. Me and my ideas for String Theory, and her infinite understanding of

mathematical fomulation. She can formalize whatever idea I come up with!

 

                Now, I do not want to meet just any mathematician. Certainly not one who's field is
"applicable" to any known science. I want a mathematician who specializes in Pure
Mathematics. Not in the least bit applicable to any known field. Researching so deeply
into the most abstract, unthinkable, proposterous derivations one could possibly reach. So
abstract that humankind would not be able to find any application for it until as far as the late
30th century. When we have build time machines. And even then, something as remote as
the problem of field mice getting in the plasma conduits. And finding a way to kill them,
since they die in the time stabilizer their alternative timelines recreate their existance every
time they are killed. So they're in need of a mathematician.

                In conclusion, I think it would be splendid to meet a really hot girl one day and she
introduces herself as "hi, im doing a phD on pure mathematics. My interests are mostly how
multiple timelines produce an infinite number of eigenstates for a given function. People say
it's useless, but I think its really neat. He He He," and I cream my pants thereafter.

  The End.

2:28am: The following is an important bulletin. Read for the sake of the world.
  As you all may know by now I am in contemplation of purchasing an exotic pet.
It has come to my attention that my life currently stale and disturbingly placid. I
believe an exotic pet is what is required to remedy such a situation. I have
eliminated the choices down to three: an octopus, a whale, or a lizard. It seems
due to my financial situation, the last of the three would be the only fitting choice
for me to afford at the moment. To mitigate this process I have consulted my
wise and trusted friend Kenny. The following is the conversation we held
(note: although he was not present, I left these messages so he may correspond
to them at an appropriate time):

Sahan> The Komodo Dragon is the largest living species of lizard growing
to an average length of 2-3 metres (6.5 - 10 feet) and weighing around 70 kg
(154 lbs). It only inhabits the islands of Komodo, Rinca, Padar, Flores, Gili
Motang, Owadi, and Samiin in central Indonesia.

Sahan> Komodo Dragons have a tail that is as long as the body, as well as
52 serrated teeth that may be 2.5 centimetres (1 inch) in length. They have
red, blood-like saliva, as they bite their own gums when they eat, thus
creating an ideal culture for the virulent bacteria that live in their mouths.
It also has a long, yellow, snake-like tongue.

Sahan>


Sahan>

12:17am:

Kenny> but yeah, hey, i gotta go switch over my laundry, but tell me about your day

Sahan> what day? well, if you must know, i had an exam at 9 am this morning. i was up until 4 finishing my cheat sheet. when i went to bed i couldn't sleep. i was tossing and turning. i think it was due to the coffee i had. i never drink coffee, but i felt i needed one that night. my parents bought me this coffee container. i never used it. and me, being a newcomer to coffee drinking, figure three teaspoons of it will do per cup. in the end i was completely on edge the entire night. the thing about coffee is that it works like cocaine. it intensifies whatever emotions you're feeling. so if you're excited, it'll make you super excited. last night i was so nervous. so the coffee made me super nervous. i found my brain just running with thoughts. random conversations were just filling through my mind
    if this could've been represented by my comic, the character of "Ken" would've been jabbering nonstop. word after word in an incoherent, continuous string. in the end i was doing the same thing on my bed. tossing, and talking to myself.
    i had to wake up by 7:15. that's when i had my alarm set. i finally fell asleep at 6:30 am. maybe a little earlier. so i actually had about 45 mins to 1 hour of sleep. in the morning i took a tiny bit more coffee to keep me upright. just a bit though. about half a teaspoon. i knew this exam was going to be hard. but there was no turning back. since i couldn't study anymore i tried my best to

Kenny> holy freaking hell shit man.

Sahan> mentally prepare myself. there was no turning back now. Death himself was awaiting me in room 1112 in the MDCL. it was going to be a fierce battle. i was certain of that. i may not be able to kill Death, but i could certainly injure it. and that was my plan. to take out an eye as i go down in flames.

Kenny> damn man, 45 minutes of sleep. and you still rocked the exam. that impressive. very impressive indeed.

Sahan> in the MDCL i met up with my buddy Brian. this is an interesting guy. i dont quite know how to describe him. but he's very peculiar. always smiling, looking straight into your eyes when talking, speaking in a very relaxed manner. and that smile is very wry. as if he's up to something. i talked to him before the exam and afterwards it occured to me that his peculiarity might be due to him being gay

Kenny> HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH

Sahan> then i thought that would certainly suck. if he was gay then that would explain a lot. i didn't want him to be gay. because then you could simply say "oh, he's gay, that explains everything". if he wasn't then his strange behaviour would be much more interesting. he could just be a very unorthodox guy. an eccentric. i liked that thought. so i chose to believe he was a heterosexual.
    the exam was a lot of fun. it was one of those exams where you either failed or you got 100%. why? because all the questions were compiled from the previous tests/exams. so unless you went over the previous questions and wrote them word-for-word (or circuit-for-circuit, in this case) you had no prospect of passing this. you would've been done. done in like a log.
    i had copied and crammed nearly every example and test question to my cheat sheet. i wrote as small as i could. in the end it paid off. im expecting somewhere near 90s for this exam. if im gonna lose marks it might be because the TA would be a bitch about not writing the conclusions in full sentences, or stating assumptions, etc.

Kenny> WHOAAAAAAAAAA. thats astounding man!

Sahan> One of the exam invigilators happened to be this really hot girl. she was probably a grad student. but mannn.... i couldn't take my eyes off of her. which was bad, because time was running out. i just remember staring at her buttocks while she kept running up and down the aisles. i also remember constantly repeating "man, i'd do her right now" to myself.

Kenny> HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Sahan> the exam then ended and i walked back home. when i got home i saw bobby and sachin packing up. they were finished their exams so they were leaving for the break. this i thought to be unfortunate because now i'd be all alone here. around this time i took a nap. i woke up at 6:30 pm. that was about 6 hours of nap. i showered, threw my tennis ball around the house, and i ate dinner. so that brings me to the present moment. where im talking with you, and reading the scores off a game of cricket from the internet. The End.

1:22am: Does anyone else think that the first part of the song actually alludes to the relationship between Daniel and Mister Miyagi?
I mean, in the Sensei and student sense. And then the rest is obviously about Daniel and Kumiko. I don't know if this is true,
but I thought it was a rather interesting thought.

2:58pm: A dream.
I dreamt this last night.

I was in a house. It was a house much like those built near seaside in Newfoundland,
the tall ones with the white planks. It was three stories high, but it was of little width.
There was a storm wracking the house. Dark clouds were rolling in from the horizon and there was
water deep into the sides of our house. In fact the grass near the side of our house was
covered entirely in water, and there was even a duck swimming about. The grass was very tall,
I noted. I was watching the water pool by the side of the house from a window up in the third
floor. My dad then came to me and talked about moving to Iceland (or was it Germany) because
apparently they had taller grass there.

Next I was downstairs, in a kind of library room. I was really sad and missing an old
friend who died. It was Angela. In this dream she died long ago. I wasn't crying but I was
lamenting her loss. And the sader I became the more the storm wracked. At one point I said out
loud "I lost the one best friend that meant so much to me." I was holding a phone up to my
ear, but there was no dial tone. I kept wishing that I could hear Angela's voice. Then I got
this idea that if I wished hard enough I would hear her. I closed my eyes, put the phone up to
my ear, and wished really hard. I wished and wished, and at one point I felt like this was
going to work. Suddenly, a voice came, "Hello" it said. And it was Angela! I was so shocked,
but a little scared too. I mean, she would have to be a ghost afterall. She started talking on
the phone to me. What was particularly strange was that she wasn't listening to me, or that I
wasn't being heard, but she just kept talking as if we're having a conversation. It was as if
she was a recording. At this I was a little dejected, but I was happy to hear her speak
nonetheless. As she was speaking we got cut off. I was so furious that I exclaimed something
in anger. But just as suddenly she called me back. She said "hello" again, and went on with
her conversation. I knew it couldn't have been a recording. But it was so odd that she wasn't
really speaking with me. She would pause for me to respond, and she'd continually answer to a
response I would have never made. It was as if everything was happening in her head. I didn't
care though, I was glad to hear her voice. Which is what I wanted. I thought it was probably a
joke she's playing on me. Then again the line got cut. I groaned in exasperation, and wondered
what might be cutting our line. When I looked outside our windows I noticed the storm. It
wasn't so dark now, but waves of water were crashing against our house. Almost like we were right
in the ocean. This time Angela never called me back, so I decided to call her. I remember
something in the dream about talking to her brother, then I got her back on the line again. I
kept thinking if this whole thing was a prank by her family. But it couldn't have been. I was
so sure I was talking to her. And again she would continue to talk to herself, and again we
were cutoff.

Next I was outside on the patio. There was no storm now. Just a large pool of water that
made its way to our doorstep. We had an enormous patio. A large cement slab, with two giant
stone pillars. It was like a structure from ancient Greece. In the water two kids were
swimming, they were family friends of ours from Montreal. I noticed that there were large ice
slabs floating on the water, almost as if the water was frozen. I quickly told the kids to get
out of the water otherwise they'd get trapped underneath. I didn't want to sound like a jerk,
so as they got out, I explained that I wouldn't normally mind them swimming, but not today
since there was ice forming on top. Then we were inside and I went back to watching this
documentary on TV about how they can recreate the faces of ancient soldiers using their skulls
and other bones.

Next I was upstairs again, on the third floor, watching from my window at the duck
swimming between the tall blades of grass next to our house. My dad then said we might not go
to Iceland (or Germany) afterall. It turned out that someone told him that being up so high in
the third floor, you can't really notice how tall the grass is.

edit: For those who do not know, Angela is a good friend of mine. I haven't heard from her in a long time,
so that probably explains a couple of things.
edit edit: Ange, if you're reading this, I am sorry to have killed you off in my dream.

3:15am: A rude awakening.
Good morning everyone!
So this will be my new journal from now on. For some this will be a continuation from my old journal at Xanga and for ther others it will be a whole new experience. It's three in the morning and I'm listening to Brent Simon, so that will be my excuse for not giving a proper introduction. This journal will be used to showcase my pictures and, of course, the Sahanie Boy comic. I enjoy writing, but I find it a rather venture to journal my experiences in the form of a comic. I need to do some editing before I put up Sahanie Boy, so in the meantime enjoy some of my latest artwork:



This one I drew whilst waiting for my bus. I don't know where the inspiration came from, really.




Oh noes! Its the buggies! .... This one I drew in the library while waiting for my friend to return my textbook. (Notice the huge lines behind the images? This picture is rediculously small)



Stem Cell! Get it? Get it? *wink wink* EH? .... This one in class.

There you have it. I shall post the first comics as soon as I finish editing them (since I must show them chronologically). Wow, look at that, I see that my only friends here are lj_maintenance, news, and tipoftheday. The default LJ friends. Hahaha. Oh, I laugh at how sad I am. Until next time, toodle ooh.

Sahan.